Monday, November 22, 2010

Coffee, and a Little advice from Bitchy.

This is sponsored content from
BlogHer and LG Text Ed

I’m here today with Bitchy, our 21 year-old college junior, who is probably the technologically savvy member of our household.

“And prettiest.”

Yes, well, as you can see is not shy about sharing her thoughts and opinions, and we will be talking about texting, sexting and other issues that might come up.

“Ewww, mother. Try NOT to say that word in my presence The sex word.”

“So, Bitchy, is the cell phone used for evil purposes in college, or by people you know? Do people send horrible pictures or terrorize each other?”

“No! At least not anyone I know. I use my phone to stay in touch with my friends, and all that, but I also use it to go online and check homework, and stuff like that. I don’t give out my number to everyone, so anyone who HAS my number wouldn’t be rude, or anything like that. And I need some money.”

“We’re trying to find out what the hazards are when you have a phone, and how you can protect yourself against dangerous or bad situations.”

“A cell phone, really, is more about keeping you safe. My friends always know where I am, and thanks to my annoying MOTHER, so does my family. So, I really think that it’s so much more about you knowing where I am, than worrying about someone sending me a nasty text. I think maybe online stuff like Skype is probably a more likely way for someone to get themselves in trouble. You have to be careful WHO you Skype with. It has to be someone you trust.”

“But how can parents help their younger kids, kids not as brilliant and as perfect as you – be safe?”

That’s easy. Never, never give your number to anyone who is questionable, never - never send any stupid pictures of yourself to ANYONE, even if they say they will not show ANYONE. People lie. And just be smart. If something doesn’t feel right, then it ISN’T right. And I still need money.”

And so you have it -be smart, and FOLLOW your gut.

Have you had a conversation with your kids (or nephews/nieces, grandchildren) about texting, sexting and safety? BlogHer is matching LG’s donation of .50 to for every comment on this post, so please tell me about your conversation with your kids in the comments. Or if you haven’t had the conversation yet, what’s holding you back? Maybe another reader will have the perfect suggestion for how you can get your conversation going. It’s important for all our families, and will get a $1.00 for every comment, question or suggestion.

And my personal advice from the mother of three texting children to other mothers and fathers? Talk ALL the time. Talk, talk, talk, until you can’t talk no more. Something is BOUND to sink in.


  1. I have not had the sexting conversation yet, as neither of my kids have cell phones (they are 8 and 10) and yes, I AM the meanest mother in. the. world. and they are the only children. who. don't. have. cellphones.
    But we have talked about what we call "putting the toothpaste back in the tube." Don't say things you can't take back, and don't say things you don't want anyone else to hear - because it will get around. No matter how trusted the friend is. I am thinking this conversation will lead into texting and sexting in the near future.

  2. Like Annie, my kids are too young. I'm sure they'll be something new and even worse for me to worry about when they need that talk.

  3. wow- totally thought putting the toothpaste back in the tube was going to be something entirely different!
    actually, annie, my kids are 14 and 16 and I (that's a capital I for emphasis, it doesn't translate well!) am the meanest mother in the whole world. I just got them a prepaid phone- to share(!) in June. Not only do they have to share it, they only have access to it when they are going out. They usually don't both go out at the same time so it hasn't been a problem yet. The only problem was my 16 yr old daughter putting boys numbers under girls names- as if i wouldn't find out!- after i had told her that she is not to be calling or texting boys. that's not what the phone is for and any boy who wants to call her can call the house. "but nobody calls anyone's house anymore!" well little girl, i've got news for you: if you DID have your own phone, you wouldn't have unlimited minutes and you'd have to make them call the house anyway so that you didn't go over! duh!
    and yes, we've talked (i've talked, she's grimaced) about sexting and naked pics and even about putting the proverbial salty toothpaste back in the tube (and I ain't talking about saying things you wish you could take back!)

  4. I have great-nieces and I have no clue if anyone's had the conversation with either. Prolly not. I'll get on it. Thanks for the reminder.

  5. Had this talk with ds#1 months before he got his first cell phone - as well as the texting while driving talk - and the talking while driving talk - the poor boy was a long way off from his temps at the time.

    At this time he doesn't have the ability to get pictures on his phone. We pay for the phone, it's for OUR convenience and we made arrangements with our service carrier to disable that part of service. It's a phone for goodness sake - yeah, another mean mom here.

  6. I think I'll have no problems dealing straight with my kids. Our family is very skilled at open communication. That said, I can understand the difficulty that some parents may experience. You just gotta know your kids already. Good thing you're doing doll.

  7. I have (unfortunately) had to have this conversation... the youngest was 14 when I realized the 16 year old was dancing with that devil... it is a very slippery slope.

  8. What blog is this? Holt shit! I can't keep up! Sound advice from Bitchy...I like her already. Interestingly enough, I just got a call from a national surveyor asking these types of questions. Sounds like she has her shit together IN THIS REGARD...yeahhhh for Bitchy. BTW, she IS pretty!

  9. Good and smart.

    Always be aware, honey, always.

  10. I have had the talk first with facebook, then with the phones, and now Skype. I don't matter. I don't know anything. I just remind them what foolishness they are playing with and it WILL come back and bite them in the butt!

    Bitchy, you are gorgeous! I'm sure you take after your mom!

  11. I have been talking, sometimes until I am blue in the face, to my teenage Niece since summer before last.....some stuff has worked, some, not so much. But, she knows where I stand and I think that has an effect.

  12. So well written note!

    And yes, I worry sometimes, nowadays, even my ten and twelve years old have portable phones, going with them to school! and my grand son goes with his fathers I-pad under the bed, where I can not see what he looks through it!

    But I believe, my grand father, also thought that the "books" are evil, and forbid my 15 year old mother to read them! She had to hide to read a "not appropriate" book, and when she was caught, she was taken out from school!